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The Donald Takes Over Florida Costco Dec 10

For those that don’t know, while this blog is quite marvelous and enthralling nonetheless it does not pay the bills. So I also have a day job working for a 3rd party vendor slanging product inside of Costco in Palm Beach Gardens, FL. If your ever there, feel free to come and say hi if you can find me.

Today was quite the exciting day at work. Not in the same making money and selling sense as Black Friday, but exciting. For once the excitement didn’t center on my area. Rather, it was because my good friend Mr. Donald Trump was stopping by to sign his new book Time to Get Tough: Making America #1 Again. Sorry Mr. Trump, I don’t plan on reading it, but I have always had a strange affinity for you. Maybe it’s the hair, maybe it’s the attitude, maybe it’s the hot blonde daughter; the Donald has always held a special place in my heart.

The Don was supposed to be there to sign his book from 2:30 – 4:00. Naturally for a man of his stature he arrived fashionably late. In comes Mr. Trump at around 2:45 in a classy suit as always and a bright orange tie. The hair was flowing majestically in the breeze from the industrial size air vents in the store, it was stunning. He had to walk right in front of me to get to his area and part of me actually thought he might stop and say hi. After all, we have met quite a few times. Growing up in Palm Beach I’ve had the chance to hob nob with the Don a little bit. Unfortunately, all I got was this sort of half smirk half wink thing that I couldn’t even recreate if I tried. I think he probably did recognize me, but knowing that I’ve fallen on some rougher times since we last met, he probably didn’t want to put me out or make me feel embarrassed. That’s just the kind of guy that the Don is.

The people had been assembling there probably since 1pm and there was quite the crowd awaiting the arrival of the man. There was a mix of all sorts there. One of the first guys in line was wearing this strange sort of Payne Stewartish golf outfit that I’m not quite sure exactly what the message was he was trying to convey. There was also this semi Milfish blonde in her 40′s with her two sons that had gone all out, heavy makeup, high heels short skirt. She was really trying to impress the Don. Sadly, I saw her leaving by herself later on. Hopefully he at least got her number. Another guy was there who calmly stood without moving for the duration of the signing holding a Trump for President sign.

There have been rumors about a Trump run for President for the last couple years; it was even featured on this blog. This signing might just show that he does in fact still have those types of aspirations. I don’t really see it happening this year, although in 4 more years who knows.

The location of the signing though is quite puzzling. My sources at the store indicated to me that it was the first book signing in the history of the location. I can’t imagine the PR team of Mr. Trump sitting around thinking about locations and somebody deciding to throw out the Costco in Lake Park. I believe his only other signing is tomorrow at another Costco up in New York I believe, but don’t quote me on that. I’d hate any of you to feel pissed about missing out on this one and make the trek up there only to be let down on my account. Do some research ya selves.

Mr. Trump sat there and graciously signed and signed. He more than made up for his tardiness by staying well past his appointed hour of departure. There was one of those I think I’m techy guys annoying me  talking about products that I know he’s not going to buy who decided at 4pm that he wanted to go get a Trump book. I prayed that the wayward individual would be too late, but the dam Don being his gracious self even was able to sign that guy’s book. I know because he came back with it in tote and pestered me with more technology bullshit for another half an hour before getting a phone call and leaving without making a purchase.

All and all it was a cool thing to be a part of. I’ve always been one who loves to observe exactly how us as Americans, or even the funny people on vacation from Manchester, England that left with books, react to celebs and situations. It didn’t really do much for my sales endeavors due to the fact that people were there for the Don and actually had to be diverted away from my location if they planned on actually coming there for shopping. There were a lot of those people too who had no idea that Donald Trump was going to be there. I can only imagine the chaos that might have ensued if they had actually advertised this thing a little.

One his way out the door Mr. Trump gave a wave to the kiosk, whether it was at me or at another employee is something that is under dispute currently. Readers of this blog though know who the wave was aimed at I’m sure. The Don then got into his waiting Maybach and floated away off to do hoodrat things with his friends or something like that.

Here’s to you Mr. Trump for bringing a little excitement to what might have been just another dreary old Saturday on Northlake in Lake Park. Come back anytime, but next time why don’t we talk some business. I know you’d be amazed at some of the deals that I could swing for you. I’d love to show you the real Art of the deal. Stop on by Mr. Trump, I got you anytime!

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2 Responses

  1. 1
    Eric 

    “I can’t imagine the PR team of Mr. Trump sitting around thinking about locations and somebody deciding to throw out the Costco in Lake Park”<—–
    Trump is trying to sell himself via the book, Costco always has those type of books. The Glenn Becks, the Obamas. Their buyers are not the activists, the intellectuals, but the armchair politicians – the Fox TV Watchers or not the bargain shoppers either
    Kind of a good man-on-the-street blog though.

  2. Aw man I just wanted to take the time to say I enjoyed reading your website.

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